India- Day 1 – Realizing that it’s time to let go.

It time.

It’s time to stop and get some good rest.  I have safely landed in Delhi.  It’s hard to believe that I am across the world from my family and about to embark on a new adventure with Compassion.  After 24 hours of travel, my mind is full of thoughts, my heart is full of emotion, but I am relinquishing all control into the hands of God.

Last week, I was in Colorado with meetings, then I had one day at home to pack, I have had several work projects in motion, all while I am trying to be the best mom and wife I can be.  It’s been a little crazy.  I have been a little crazy.

But now, I have done what I can, and I am ready for what is next as God leads.

I must admit that lately I have tried to take things into my control.  I try so hard to perform well, and when I  make mistakes it drives me nuts.  My great sin is the fear of people.  I am a people pleaser by nature and while this helps in the world of serving others, it can eat at me if and when I feel like I am not meeting the expectations of others.  I then put the fear of man before the fear of God …and this my friends is wrong. I try to be a perfect mom, but so often I fall short.  I try to serve as well as I can with excellence so that others will be pleased, but Lord knows I am not perfect.  I try and I try and I try.

I try to prepare my family as well as I can when I know I am going to travel.  I try to get the groceries purchased and all my loose ends tied up.  I try to prepare my church groups and my travelers. But no matter how hard I try, usually something goes wrong, maybe nothing too big, but usually there is a glitch.

But God is good, and  as much as I try to have  control over what happens in life…I am not in control.  I am not in control of this life. I am not in control of what others may feel and think.   I am not in control of what happens on the trip.  I can try and plan the best itinerary ever, but God can certainly move that plan and take it an entirely different direction.

So tonight, before I go to bed in my Delhi hotel, I am stopping to surrender all those things that I keep trying to do… and all those things that I keep worrying about and all those things that distract me from what I am suppose to do.

I am letting go.

My purpose is simply this.  To give God glory in all that I do and trust that no matter the outcome, I honor Him with my life.  So as I try, I can surrender my plans… for He has me in His hands.

I am safe and sound tonight and so thankful for this hotel room with air conditioning and internet, flushing toilets and 3 towels in the bathroom.  I feel peace.  I feel happy to know that I get to do some seriously loving on kids who need it.  I am excited now to see this group from Ohio that will arrive tomorrow night to be with me.  I am blessed God has given me a few hours of quiet, even if it is in Delhi, so that I can prepare to serve… and to give him the Glory.

So, as you all are awake on the other side of the world, my tired body goes to bed reflecting on this Psalm.

Psalm 4:8

8 In peace I will lie down and sleep,
for you alone, LORD,
make me dwell in safety.

He loves us.  And when I step out of that comfortable place of home, He always reminds me He is here and I then realize I don’t have try so hard because my Abba, my Daddy, He’s got me, he holds me and it is good.

Thanks friends for your prayers and following me on this journey.

3 Comments on “India- Day 1 – Realizing that it’s time to let go.

  1. Praying for you and your group, Patricia. Hope you get some peaceful rest tonight.

  2. Oh, how I needed this right now! Thanks for sharing your heart. Covering you in prayer!

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