True Confessions of a Grandmother…..

The secret was revealed. Yes, a confession was made and now we all know the truth.

You see, my daughter Grace has not worn a dress by her own choice since she was six.  Last year I had to force her into a skirt while we traveled to Africa, traumatized by this event, she quickly gave it away when she got home. Other than that, Grace refused to wear a dress.  Why? I would ask her… She said she hated dresses.

We had wondered for years why this kid refused to wear a dress, why the frill and elegance of a dress was so appalling for Grace….but finally we learned the truth…it’s all Grandma Jaynes fault….and Grandma finally confessed.

How the confession took place…..

It all started Sunday afternoon when I took the girls shopping.  Isabel found an Easter dress and I looked at Grace and said, “Why don’t you see what you can find for Easter?” I never expected to find Grace in a dressing room trying on a dresses, but sure enough, she came out with this adorable dress on. I guess now that she is in 7th grade, the trauma of the past has worn off.  We bought the dress, I took pictures because I wasn’t sure if this would last. I at least wanted the memory to last….

But why now? What was it that kept Grace out of dresses for seven years?

Last night while Grandma and Grace were together, Grandma confessed to Grace about a traumatic memory that Grace had buried because of the deep pain…Grandma brought it to the surface. When Grace was five, Grandma decided to make a dress for Grace. It was spring time, and Grandma bought some yellow, cotton fabric with something so horrible….and frightening…that it would traumatize Grace for a very long time. What was Grandma thinking?  She actually bought fabric with….LADYBUGS on it.   Despite the scary bugs, Grandma made the dress for Grace. Apparently, when Grandma gave Grace the dress, Grace freaked out.

I do remember the event and I remember that dress. (I think it ended up going to my daughter Isabel).  All these years I never realized that this was the cause of Grace’s adverse reaction to dresses. For years I just thought it was a grade school girl thing, or a phase, but now we all know the truth. That Ladybug dress traumatized my daughter, and she simply hated dresses after that.  Grandma has carried this burden for a long time.  Grandma blamed herself for years for Grace’s fear, and rightly so, after all, ladybugs are very scary.

Well now that the truth is out…and confessions have been made, we can all move on. It is good to see Grace can put on a dress again, floral works, but no bugs please.

This mystery has been solved, but now I want to know why Grace won’t wear pink…Grandma Jayne, do you need to confess something?

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4 Comments on “True Confessions of a Grandmother…..

  1. That story reminded me of something I had completely forgotten. When my daughter was around 2 or 3 she had a dream that ladybugs were biting her toes. For several years afterwards she refused to go to bed without socks on so the ladybugs wouldn’t get her. She’s 11 now and completely healed emotionally. 🙂 What is it with ladybugs? Thanks for the memory.

  2. Who knows why they decide one day to never wear a dress and then all of a sudden, its ok again. Girls girls girls.

  3. Now you know why I never made the girls pj’s with any kind of insect design. After years not having time to sew, the dress was one of my early projects and Gracies reaction was rather surprising. By the way, I still have a swatch of the fabric in case Gracie wants to see what was so terrifying about the dress (fabric). I think it was the beatles and fireflies that took it over the top. Sounds like Gracie is now on the road to recovery. Thank goodness! Grandma Jayne

  4. Believe it or not my middle daughter went for YEARS without wearing dresses. Probably just until 8th or 9th grade. Now she is BEGGING to buy, not only skirts ( which were her first compromise), but DRESSES. I’m not sure there was a bug issue in her early life. But I have pictures of her in preschool wearing beautiful dresses…big, frilly, fluffy dresses. Dresses that would be a little girl’s dream (see, I never had such dresses as a child). In second grade, preparing for First Communion, you would have thought I was torturing her trying to get her into a white dress. Finally, she did put that dress on….for the 10 minutes it took to get pictures and then for the hour it took for the Mass. The dress came off immediately after! In our house it remains a mystery….or it could have been the poinsettia Christmas dress I made her wear?

    By the way, Grace, you look beautiful!

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