He whisked me away….

Ok.. it wasn’t quite like this. Maybe in my female daydream way, I would like to think that my husband had been romantically planning for months to surprise me with a trip, but no, only since last Monday did my husband surprise me by cashing in miles, cashing in Hertz points and booking the Hilton in Phoenix for a weekend away…. with me. After three years, my husband and I flew away this last weekend….without the kids, without work, without computers, and went to Arizona.  It was completely unplanned and un-budgeted. Oh…and we had a blast under the warm Arizona sky, golfing, swimming, eating, reading, star gazing and laughing at the man by the pool with his speedo and button down dress shirt, with the white, knee high socks, tennis shoes, gangster hat, and sun glasses.  I think he was 85 or so but something about him struck us as awesome!

Early last week something in us spurred a spontaneous trip. It was totally outside my husbands normal character in practicality. It wasn’t that we had this big fight, it wasn’t that our marriage was on the brinks, it wasn’t that we haven’t had time to vacation, but I think it was…..

…….that we missed each other. We haven’t seen each other in a solo way for a long time.  We haven’t had the time to let go and see each other without stress, without responsibility. We haven’t had the time to spend hours talking, dreaming and checking in with each other.  We discovered…..

……we still like each other…..a lot.  We enjoy each others company, we enjoyed sitting around and talking, laughing, sharing stories, figuring out problems and admiring our kids, and each other.

We have had dates with each other, we have had trips (business trips), but we haven’t had “us” time.

For many years of our marriage, Stephen and I made a commitment to go away at least once a year to catch up.  Even when our kids were little, we tried to get away to keep our marriage a priority. Three years ago, we did this amazing trip to Greece.  It was like the trip of all trips with each other, but since then, we forgot to do it again.  We got into an investment that failed, we went through a nightmare with the economy and our investment lost a lot of money, I went back to work, our kids got older and their lives got very busy, and the stress took its tool.  This last week we finished our taxes, wrote off our loss, and kissed our investment goodbye for the last time.  A trip was in order, a time to be married, to see each other, to move on and continue our story.

I always told my friends, you can be the best parents in the world.  You could spend hours and hours with your kids building blocks, playing dolls, reading books, doing all the right stuff, being in PTA, Boosters, but if you don’t remember that you are married, take that time, do the honeymoon again and again, then your kids won’t have parents who are together….in the end.

This last weekend was long overdue and we learned again how much we value each other.  I made him laugh at my Steve Miller song singing, and I laughed at him when we got in trouble on the golf course from a grumpy old man.  He did not laugh at my golf game, even though I seriously suck, but he listened to my long stories of traveling this year, he let me drive the golf cart, and I listened to the things that have made him feel stressed.  We listened to the stories about what makes us happy, and then we dreamed about our next honeymoon….and it was fun, I was happy we spent the money, I was happy we were married. I was happy we remembered why we not only love each other, but what makes us like each other!