Letting go of the comfortable

Passport…..check

Camera and Computer…..check

Malarone for Malaria…..check

Cipro (in case I end up sick)…..check

Clothes……check

Bible and books ….check

Money and Credit card….check

Starbucks instant coffee…..check

Lots of shoes for kids…..check

I have this crazy busy day, but felt like I needed to start the day with a little quiet time and a few words. After all, I am a verbal processor.

Going to Peru with Compassion sounds exciting and truly I am excited, but leaving my home is always hard. With my family doing their own stuff, my daughter leaving for camp and my husband traveling to Lifest next weekend (Grandma is helping us out), it’s hard for me to trust that everything will be ok. Julia is 15 now, and I am sure she is capable of packing up. Actually, out of all my kids, Julia is the least likely to forget something important like her underwear or her sleeping bag (which has happened to one of my kids going off to camp). I have to trust everyone will get to the right place at the right time. I have to trust that my husband has it all handled.

Letting go is hard. My husband is highly capable, but still, I like to feel in control. I like to keep it all moving and make sure the little chickens are safe in the coop.

I am missing our big 4th of July celebration in our neighborhood. My job for 12 years has always been making a good music playlist because we set up a sound system and blare music for the neighborhood. We play games, have water fights, BBQ’s and fireworks (which are legal in our state). Last night my kids realized I wouldn’t be home to do my job so they happily spent a bunch of time in iTunes and carefully picked some fun music. I admit it made me a little sad because I hate missing a party.

It’s always a strange feeling to walk into a new situation. It’s my first time to Peru and my first time staying at one project for a whole week. It’s my first time I will meet any of the 15 people that I will be leading on this trip and my first time living in the jungle….Wait, I take that back, I have stayed in a couple of jungles during travel. The last time I stayed in the jungle we discovered a giant spider on the wall. I won’t pass this on to the group though. I am sure there are no spiders where we are going (wink wink).

All these things combined present the opportunity to trust God. I feel like I need Him. I need him beside me when I travel. I need His wisdom when I lead others on this trip. I need Him to be with my family and keep them safe. I need Him to keep me company when I feel insecure. I need the prayers of my friends. I need a Big God.

I slept well last night. I feel at peace, and I feel like God has something special for me and this group going to Peru, but it’s always hard to let go of the comfort of home, and the stability of life and to step into a situation that isn’t necessarily comfortable.

It’s funny how comfortable we get with life, until it changes, then we realize how much we truly need God.

When have you felt uncomfortable and realized you needed God?

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2 Comments on “Letting go of the comfortable

  1. Patricia have a safe trip! You will be in our thoughts and prayers. I had many of feeling you have right now this past December when I made my 2nd trip to Ethiopia. My husband is very hands on but I too was worried about the “what if’s” Safe travels and look forward to hearing about your trip.

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